by Wheaton Hop

Hey, Dummies!

You know the old saying, “Not all heroes wear capes.”? Yeah, yeah. I know. Cheesy as hell. But I am here to confirm this indisputable fact and I’ve brought the proof to back it up. It just may be me (I highly doubt it within this community) but more often I tend to find my hero in worn jeans, ratty Converse, and a faded Riverdales t-shirt just standing there in a small, dark club ready to save the day. A hero capable of rocking your world, bringing you a sound that you most certainly may find endearingly familiar but also injects their own style and attitude enough to have you chanting the eponymous anthems that we so love in our little wheelhouse. My proof, you ask? Well, let’s just talk about Chicago’s soon to be legends, Capgun Heroes.

It is a rare thing to discover a band and be so completely blown away from the get go. But that is exactly what happened to me with these guys. It’s hard to believe that it has been almost 2 years since I asked myself, “Who The Fuck Are These Dorks?!.” I remember so clearly hearing that EP on Bandcamp and thinking, “This is the best thing going right now. Holy fuck. I need more of this. WE need more of this!!” They swooped in, seemingly unknown (like most heroes, duh) and brought back a new and much needed energy boost. The hope and anticipation of waiting to hear more from these guys was a killer. But I am beyond stoked to tell you that that wait is almost over. The first full length release from Capgun Heroes drops September 24th on Hey Pizza! Records. Last Call For Adderall is destined to be one of the top LPs of 2021, if not the last few years. To say that this has been the longest tease in punk rock history doesn’t feel like an understatement to me.

Channeling Riverdales, the guys open this banger of a record with Back It Up. They get it. In order to prove your point, you gotta bring the goods and Capgun does that in spades from the very onset. Delivering tight, top notch rhythm and tones with catchy, memorable lyrics that promise you they Won’t Do You Wrong. And with a song as amazing as Won’t Do You Wrong, you know they are worthy of your love. These guys don’t only bring the musical chops that will keep you singing along and dancing all night, they’ll leave you wishing you were That Girl, which also happens to be the first single and video released for this album. The first 3 tracks are instant hits and those hits don’t stop coming. Operation Chaos follows with a sound reminiscent of The Lillingtons and it is a knockout. Reminiscent, sure, but the high caliber sonic blast is uniquely their own and they continue to prove their prowess track after track after track. It only gets better from here.

Being a huge sucker for the more sweet and mushy lovelorn songs, track 5 Let You Go is an absolute highlight for me. Chronicling the heart’s missteps and regrets, it’s another one of those songs that leaves you aching to just go back and make it all good even if it isn’t the best choice, it’s a thought that has passed through all of our minds. You may not always win in the end when it comes to love, but it’s pretty great to have songs like that to keep us company. And to follow that track up with a cover of the Do You Wanna Dance version that was masterfully performed by Ramones (originally by Bobby Freeman) is a stroke of pure genius. Do You Wanna Dance is a classic staple in the punk rock world and Capgun Heroes do it justice with finesse and obvious talent that should remind us that they themselves are on a path to greatness. Heading into the last half of this instant classic album in its own right, the greatness only intensifies. Tonight is chock full of scorching guitars and fierce drumming that leaves you breathless. It’s a rager and it’s gonna bring you back to life.

Now, with that said. Mmm mm mm. Here come my picks for top tracks of the album. Waiting is flawless. It’s maybe the slowest jam on Last Call For Adderall and it’s not a mellow tune at all as far as slow jams go. It’s got plenty of dance and sway but it is absolutely gorgeous and a song I think a lot of folks would hope someone is singing for them. Definitely elicits the quintessential Heather sigh. Love, love, love Waiting and I hope you dig it as much as I do. Wanna Go is further proof that Capgun Heroes have brought us one of the catchiest albums of our time and, if you’re like me, you’ll wanna go away just to be driving down the road singing this one at the top of your lungs.

Lobotomy, the 10th song on this 12 song masterpiece is another force to be reckoned with. This frenzy reminds us these guys are not messing around! It’s a powerhouse and the pace of those drums is electrifying. Following up is Stuck With You. And I’m almost feeling redundant when I say this, but goodgawddamn, what a hit! They have definitely earned the closing track, H.E.R.O.E.S. You’re going to be singing along to this triumph with that aforementioned H-E-R-O-E-S over and over and over again.

So, do yourself a favor and head on over to Hey Pizza! Records and scoop up Capgun Heroes Last Call For Adderall, one of the best debut full lengths ever in my opinion, before it’s too late. Every song on this release is an absolute hit and you’re going to be thanking these jean clad, t-shirt wearing, Converse scuffing legends for coming to the rescue for a long, long time. I promise, I wouldn’t do you wrong.

Peace, Dummies!